24 hours

A poem for my Dad who passed away on April 6, 2013
written by Cathy Dietsch
April 5, 2014

In 24 hours
one year ago.
In 24 hours
Had I just known.

Fly away, fly away
Fly away, back to you.
I would have just gone.
To see all this through.

To be by your side
holding your hand.
In 24 hours, I would just stand.

Stand up with you and give you a hug.
Just one more dance, one more embrace.
That sparkle in your eye, a kiss on the face.

In 24 hours I'd be sitting with you.
We may have told stories, until the night was through.

Perhaps, however, you could not talk.
Like your mother.

motionless
cold hospital bed.

In 24 hours, however, I did not fly to you.
But instead.
I had no idea, no warning.
No clue.

I complained.
"I have so much to do".
I was sore. I was tired.
My pregnant belly, the pain in my ear.

in 24 hours, I'd shed many tears.

One week and one half, you had many laughs.
75 years!
A party, just for you!
Had I known, I would have been there,
enjoying a cupcake. One. OK, maybe two.

Lungs...
   falling
      breath
Heart...
   pump
      pump
       
No more.

In 24 hours, *I* would have been the one at your door.

You always said you would never retire.
For the love of music, you just couldn't expire.

Teach. Compose. Teach. Compose. Teach. Teach. Teach.
Teach some more.

Just who was that, WHO knocked at your door?

In 24 hours, I'd try to be strong.
My Daddy. No answer.
Where is he?

There must be something wrong.

Getting ready for work.
That is how you wanted it.
You didn't want to be
Lifeless, in a cold hospital bed.
 -just like your poor mother, you always said.

In 24 hours, I lost you for good.
A full day of lessons, just as you should.
After that knock on your door.
Where is he?

Nevermore.

The lessons. They're cancelled.
Your children forlorn.
For what seems like forever, now do I mourn.

But there's hope. Yes. There's hope.
I am part of you.
I see you in my brothers, my daughters, my son.

When I look in the mirror, I have it too.
Your eyes, your heart, your passion for good.
Your grandchildren, all part of you too.

My mother. Your wife. The memories there.
Your music. YOUR music. It is everywhere.

I know where you are now.
In heaven above.
Sharing your gifts
with the ones that you love.

So as you conduct that heavenly choir.
Think of us, igniting your fire.

Though you had to leave us behind.
With each other, we all will be fine.

In 24 hours, there's hope in my heart.
There's a passion within me,
from end to the start.

So as I begin this day anew.
Always remember
I love you.

In 24 hours, I'll sing again

morning, good morning, good morning, good morning, good morning, good morning, good morning to you

My daddy, my friend.